I remember a time when meeting someone who was just as damaged was a bit of a relief. Everyone walking…
Glamour Magazine wrote a very famous article on the things a woman should have and know by 30. It inspired me to write my own list. I don’t know everything, but I have figured out a few things. There is so much fear around women “aging” for me, I love it. I love the knowledge and power that comes with learning and growing up. I like myself a lot more than I did when I was 22. Here are my rules to live by. I would love to know what rules YOU live by. Leave me a comment or tweet me!
1. Love the right person. You know in your gut what feels right and what feels wrong. If your relationship is more work than it is calm, it’s probably the wrong one. Don’t throw love around like the flavor of the week. If you love someone and you swear you will love them forever, then you have to love them forever and that probably means some messy stuff that won’t be as fun as the “falling in love” part was. It will be worth it. Also, chances are that you might need to do a whole lot of living before you meet this person. that’s ok too.
2. Figure out what you love to do and then figure out how to do that as a job. As you get older you will realize that working, even at your dream job is still working. Maybe you cannot be the next Adele, but there are hundreds of jobs you can do in the music business. Maybe you will not be the next Steve Jobs, but someone needs to design the graphics right?
3. Do a better job than people were expecting you to. Do your homework, be an expert, give whatever you are doing everything you’ve got. Blow them away, even on the little stuff.
4. Be responsible for your own aura. Walk into every room with positive energy. Find a way to respond to others negativity with love. Try not to complain. (I’m still working on this.)
5. People make mistakes. Every single person does. Learn to accept all apologies even when you kinda sorta think the person sucks.
6. Help others, it’s easy to see when someone is drowning. Make sure to ask if you can help. Be a light in others dark. You have no idea how awesome life will be when your entire community of friends and loves is walking around basking in the light that you are all shining on eachother.
7. Hold constant gratitude in your heart for the others that have gone out on a limb to support you. Never forget that they introduced you to your lover, your next career move or dry shampoo. If you trace your steps backwards you can probably see where they made a huge dent in your life. You don’t own those people flowers, or expensive gifts, the best thank you is allowing them to see you shine and taking them along for the ride.
8. Focus. yes, Tumblr is addicting. But, please focus.
9. Save your money. When you are very poor save $20 a week, when you are not poor save $2000. Put it away, invest it, you will need it one day for a house, a car, to retire, the clock is only ticking one way. You will want and need many things more than you will want those jeans, save up!
10. Ask others questions about themselves. Make sure the ratio of telling your own stories to hearing others is 1: 3. You already know your stories, open up your heart and learn others.
11. Work to be better, if this means an extra class, course, or more time practicing. Never be content with what people are telling you is great.
12. Don’t put crappy work, or crappy pictures out there on the internet. It’s all a reflection of you and it will live forever. This goes along with not being a total dick on the internet too. Just don’t.
13. Being happy has nothing to do with Twitter followers, money, work, or the famous people you know. Happiness is a state of your soul, and your actions speak louder than your words. You can tell the people that are truly happy in their souls. You can also tell the people who are unhappy trying to act happy. You can REALLY tell the people that WANT you to think they are happy, when clearly, they are not. Everyone is at their own point in their own journey, and that’s ok too. Just make sure to keep your priorities straight.
14. Make sure your ratio of selfies is 1:5 with photos of everything else. I’m totally sure your face is awesome, but no one’s face is THAT awesome. Not even you, Kim.
15. Don’t blame other people when your life sucks. It’s your life. If you want to change your health, job, friends, weight, happiness, then it’s up to you. Seriously.
16. When the earth crumbles beneath you, and it seems like everyone is attacking you and against you, be calm in your heart. Apologize if you are wrong, stand proud if you are right. Do this with class and an educated heart, bitter fights and name calling get people nowhere.